Let's face it, life is hard and sh*t gets real. For many of us we become everyone and everything in a day except who we really are meant to be. We support our spouses, our children, their careers, their activities and even though we may take care of the house, bills and may even work ourselves, we sometimes feel little reward and/or at the very least a lack of appreciation. Now, in most cases the little reward or lack of appreciation may not even truly be the case. It is more than likely something we started thinking and feeling along the way and no matter how many thank you's we get, because we are not living our "Best lives " or the version of life that we really want, we start feeling this way no matter how true, untrue or indifferent it is.
See, it's really not about being appreciated or not. It's more about the lack of feeling we have inside of ourselves because we feel "something" is missing from our mundane routines. At some point or another, I think we have all felt this. We love our children and our spouses, but at some point we dreamed of something so much bigger and somewhere along the carpool lines, the sports, the lunches and the bills we lost a part of ourselves that we sometimes find hard to get back. It's important to know that you are not alone. Not alone in these feelings and there is no shame in having them. Put the guilt or whatever you are feeling aside because you are human, and you are allowed to be. You are an imperfect person, but one who loves with everything you have, unfortunately, you are probably forgetting to love yourself. Been there and done that. But, you know what? I wouldn't change anything. Changing anything would mean that I wouldn't be here sitting and writing this and educating you on the fact that your feelings are real, they are valid, they are worthy and so are you.
The fact is that as a person, a Mom, a wife, a husband or whomever you are, you are allowed to be selfish, Yes, I said it. You're allowed to be selfish and long for more. You're allowed to feel selfish and start taking care of you. You are allowed to be selfish and go and close yourself in the bathroom and soak in the tub for as little or as long as you need to. Your significant other can and will tend to the kids. They will survive. They will all live, they will not set the house on fire, they will not eat dirt (well, maybe?), they will not fall into the abyss and everything, everything will be just fine. How many of you right now are sitting back laughing? Yep, I would have done the same. Why? Because like you I convinced myself that everything would, in fact, fall apart if I was not there every second to be the glue that held it all together. Geeze, no wonder why we convince ourselves we are not appreciated. We couldn't feel appreciated doing everything, every second of the day if there was no other feeling in the world...other than appreciation.
When is the last time you soaked in the tub? When is the last time you drank a HOT cup of coffee or tea? When is the last time you said I am going to be selfish, even if for only 15 minutes and just sat outside with nature, on the beach or read a book or got a manicure without a screaming child in tow or your phone dinging like crazy because your teenager can't figure out how to turn on the washing machine or iron his/her own shirt? When? Girl, Guy, whoever is reading this, get a grip. It's a trap. One you have led yourself to believe and convinced yourself of. Your child can cook toast, he can iron. Your husband can keep them all alive, animals with 4 legs included. And, they will be fine.
Get out of your head. Find yourself, again or for the first time. Inhale. Exhale. Be selfish because there is power in it and you don't need permission. You need this like your mouth needs some Listerine and toothbrush when you wake up. You need this. You want this. Go, go and be selfish. It's okay. And, you will feel refreshed and everyone else will notice. They may even like this refreshed new you and encourage you to do whatever you are doing a little more. So, yeah, they will encourage you to be selfish and I don't know about you but I am totally cool with that.
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